New things to try in bed. Yeah, you're here because Tuesday night is starting to feel like Groundhog Day with less clothing. Here's the thing: a 2023 study found that couples who try something new in bed just once a month report 34% higher sexual satisfaction than the "if it ain't broke" crowd. Keep reading coz I'm giving you 15 actual moves, plus the exact words to use so she doesn't think you've been watching weird stuff without her.
In this article, we'll cover:
15 New Things To Try In Bed When You’re Tired Of The Same Old ‘Left, Right, Repeat’ Routine
If your sex life feels predictable, your brain literally clocks out; that's not romance dying, that's just biology being a bored accountant. Here are 15 new things to try in bed that'll make her glad she didn't marry the guy who thinks "switch to missionary" counts as variety.
Idea #1 – Slow Sex That Makes Her Melt
Slow sex is the grown-man version of confidence. You move like you own the moment, not like you’re racing your own orgasm. This is tantric sex energy: slow, present, breath-led, and dialed into her body instead of your performance.
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Idea #2 – The Full-Body Worship Session
Most guys touch like they’re skipping ads. Worship touch is different: it makes your partner’s pleasure the whole point. This is how you enhance intimacy and deepen emotional closeness without forcing anything.
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Idea #3 – Run A Wartenberg Wheel Down Her Body
A Wartenberg wheel is originally a medical tool used to test skin sensation. In bed, it’s sensation play that turns her skin into an instrument. This works because your skin is loaded with mechanoreceptors and thermoreceptors.
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Idea #4 – Turn A Hairdryer Into A Teasing Tool
Cold air teasing is unfair. In a good way. Goosebumps happen when tiny arrector pili muscles contract, and your body goes “attention please.” A hairdryer is something new that feels playful, safe, and weirdly intimate.
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Idea #5 – Switching Roles For The Night
Most couples run the same script. Same starter, same middle, same finish. Switching roles breaks the loop. This can be power play, light bondage, strap-on play, or just her calling the shots. Consent stays the boss.
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Idea #6 – Give Her An Erotic ASMR Experience
ASMR done right is basically foreplay for the nervous system. It draws attention to the moment where desire lives. And yes, bro, this is also a sneaky way to get better at phone sex and talk dirty without feeling like a cringe robot.
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Idea #7 – Watch Her Masturbate
Watching her masturbate is one of the cleanest sex ideas on earth: she shows you what works, in real time, on her body. It also fast-tracks your finger and oral play skills by helping you stop guessing.
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Idea #8 – Race To The Seventh Heaven
"Race to the Seventh Heaven" is actually a mutual masturbation competition where you both try to be the first to hit seven orgasms. Like a race to see who gets there first. Sounds wild, right?
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Idea #9 – Shadow-Light Tease Sex
Shadow play is sexy because it leaves room for imagination. Your brain fills gaps with sexual fantasies, and that’s jet fuel.
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Idea #10 – Create A Porn Video Together
This is only hot when it’s safe. Period. Digital sex content shared without consent can seriously harm people, and once it’s online, it can be brutally hard to control. So if you are both a 'Hell yes,' get creative; if not, skip this idea and go to the next.
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Idea #11 – Sample An Aphrodisiac Together
Aphrodisiacs are a vibe more than a miracle. The scientific basis for many “aphrodisiac foods” is limited. But turning it into a playful date night ritual can still spark curiosity, flirtation, and a fun way to spice things up. It works because anticipation works.
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Idea #12 – Have Sex In Front Of A Mirror
Mirror sex is an instant novelty because you see angles you never see. It also makes you notice her body like you’re dating again. And it’s a sneaky confidence boost when you actually compliment what you see.
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Idea #13 – Try Fun & Messy Food Play
Food play works because it flips sex into a playful act instead of a performance. When laughter, licking, and teasing mix together, tension drops and physical connection climbs fast. A tequila body shot is a perfect example. It’s simple, messy, and ridiculously hot when done slowly.
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Idea #14 – Dawdle In A Slow Steamy Shower Session
Shower sex sounds simple. In reality, the magic is the build-up, not rushing straight to penetration. Steam, warm water, slippery skin. Brother, that combo turns basic foreplay into something seriously hot.
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Idea #15 – Defying-Gravity Sex On A Swing
A sex swing instantly turns your bedroom into a new playground for sex positions. Gravity changes everything. Angles shift, pressure changes, and suddenly, the same movements feel completely different. That’s why couples use swings to explore positions that would be almost impossible on a bed.
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If you try one of these new things and it feels awkward, good. Awkward means you’re learning and building new pathways together, not sleepwalking through your sex life.
Now you’ve got the menu. Let’s talk about how to ask without making it weird.
Andrew’s Expert Tip On How To Talk To Your Partner About Trying New Things Using The SQL Perfect Day Exercise
The quality of a couple’s sex life depends heavily on how well partners talk about sex. One powerful tool for this is the SQL Perfect Day Exercise. Each partner describes their ideal sexual day and the new things they would love to try in bed. Here’s how to do it.
Step #1 – Write Your Own Perfect Sexual Day (What New Things To Try In Bed?)
This is not a porn script. Think of it like building a sex bucket list for your intimate life. The goal is simple. Explore fantasies and break free from routine so new things to try in bed feel easier to talk about later.
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Step #2 – Ask Her To Write Her Perfect Day Too
Now the exercise becomes a deep connection tool. Two people exploring fantasies together creates a stronger physical connection and emotional closeness.
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Step #3 – Share Your Perfect Days Without Judging Each Other
This step builds trust and an intimate connection. The point is understanding fantasies, not negotiating them.
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Step #4 – Find The Overlap That Feels Exciting For Both Of You
Most couples discover they share more fantasies than they expected. That overlap is where the fun begins.
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Step #5 – Pick One New Thing To Try In Bed Together
One exciting twist done well beats ten awkward attempts. Agree on one thing that you both want to try tonight and get into it.
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The SQL Perfect Day Exercise is not about acting out every fantasy. It is about exploring sexuality openly so partners understand each other better. That openness creates intimate connection, deeper emotional closeness, and a sex life that keeps evolving instead of repeating the same routine. And brother, that’s where the real magic happens.
Alright, now let me borrow a woman’s brain for a minute, because men love stepping on rakes.
Men think the problem is a lack of sex ideas. Women say the problem is how the idea gets delivered. Here are the most common mistakes men make when introducing something new in bed and how to avoid them.
Mistake #1 – Rushing The Conversation Or Bringing It Up At The Wrong Time
If she’s stressed, tired, or you’re mid-argument, your “something new” request lands like a chore. Pick a neutral, connected moment, not a desperate moment.
Solution
Mistake #2 – Presenting New Ideas Without Any Warmth Or Reassurance
When you pitch kinky sex ideas like a demand, her brakes slam on. Warmth tells her this is about both of you, not you outsourcing her body.
Solution
Mistake #3 – Presenting A Fully Formed No-Options Plan
“Tonight we’re doing anal sex and a sex party and a sex swing.” Relax. That’s not confidence, that’s panic.
Solution
Mistake #4 – Taking a " No" Or "Not Now" As A Personal Rejection
A no to an act is not a no to you. Consent is specific, not global. When you sulk, you train her that honesty causes drama.
Solution
Mistake #5 – Failing To Do The Homework
Toys, anal play, light bondage, even something simple like lube, all of it needs basic safety knowledge. Nothing destroys a sex life faster than pain, infection, or a toy getting stuck because you got cocky.
Solution
If you want your partner to be open to something new, act like a safe man, not a horny salesman. That’s the whole cheat code.
Cool. Now let’s hit the questions you’re already thinking.
Frequently Asked Questions
Most guys don’t need more sex ideas. They need cleaner execution and fewer unforced errors.
Here are the answers that actually help.
Say: “I’m not asking you to be someone else. I’m asking if we can try something new together.” Then offer two gentle options and say “no pressure” out loud, because consent must be freely given.
Use a three-item starter pack: mirror sex, mutual masturbation, and a slow, sensual massage. Those are new things to try in bed that don’t require weird props or advanced skills.
Aim for one “something new” per month, not per night. Consistency beats chaos. The goal is a sex life that stays alive, not a performance schedule.
Use humor, then reset: “That was clumsy. I love you. Want to go back to what works?” Awkward moments don’t ruin intimacy; sulking ruins it.
Start with low-stakes novelty: sensory play, soft lighting, erotic stories, or a blindfold. Then take turns and let her control the pace, because control creates safety, and safety creates arousal.
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More new sex positions needed