Missionary Sex: An Illustrated Guide

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Missionary Sex: An Illustrated Guide

Missionary sex may be one of the most common sex positions out there. While it is popular, it doesn’t have to be boring. Think of missionary as a gateway to an intimate land of your you and your partner’s sex life.

Missionary is the fondue of sex!

There are so many benefits for both parties and variations and in this guide, we will show you how to how to get the most of this creme bruelee of sex!

What is Missionary Sex?

The missionary position is where one of you is laying down with your legs bent and spread apart while your partner is in between your legs.

Now it is important to be wary that you or your partner, whoever is on top, to be cautious that you are not bearing all your weight or your partner’s weight. This can risk serious injury and let’s be honest who wants to go to the ER for an injury potentially caused by sex?!

You can have your partner move the elbows so that they rest on either side of your body in order to alleviate some of the weight coming down on you. You can also have him only place partial weight on you so that it is not uncomfortable for you.

Why is Missionary Such a Classic In The Bedroom?

More Skin to Skin Contact

While other sex positions such as reverse cowgirl don’t allow maximum skin-on-skin experience, this is where missionary comes in.

Consider also that instead of a position such as doggy style where you are being pounded into, missionary allows exploration of you and your partner’s body as you can use and oftentimes end up, using your entire body to explore and bring your partner as well as yourself to orgasm.

In fact, it can even help you discover different angles and what spots drive you wild!

It Opens The Door Way For Bedroom Communication

Sex therapists, and psychologists alike all insist that communication in the bedroom will help power up your sex life.

While this may be true communication is not always easy to do. When you’re getting taken into an orgasm from behind, your partner can’t really hear you all that well because you are facing the wall.

So if you are a quiet one in the bedroom, or do not make a lot of noise it can be hard for your partner to gauge if you are enjoying yourself in doggie style, or any sex position that requires you to contort your body in ways that make talking or communicating almost non-existent.

You can moan, scream, and verbally comment on what you like or what you want to change in the bedroom for maximum pleasure in the missionary position.

It’s Not Intimidating

Sex can be very intimidating for many people. For one thing, some people haven’t had any partners open to trying different variations or positions.

Another reason missionary is not so intimidating is because if you have bad hips or a sore back it can be adjusted so you are comfortable.

Factor in as well that missionary is so basic that you don’t have to worry about contorting your body in an uncomfortable way. Missionary is an ideal starting place to discover what you really enjoy in bed.

It’s Extremely Intimate and Romantic

The missionary position is ideal if you want to add a little romance to the bedroom. You can make eye contact and if you really want your partner’s gears to turn you can stare him in the eyes and talk dirty.

Who doesn’t love dirty talk falling off a pair of sexy lips?!

You can also watch your partner’s athletic body glistening with sweat, and excitement as you make passionate love to each other. Hello Magic Mike!

You Are Less Likely To Become Injured

Those who may be new to BDSM or advanced moves in the bedroom run a higher chance of injury. A new study shows that doggy-style sex is as much as five times more likely to injure the female, or even worse break the male’s penis compared to missionary.

With the missionary position, you have as little as a 1% risk of injury.

It’s a Great Way To Play Both Top and Bottom Roles

If you love submitting to your partner, missionary is your ticket to pleasure! You’ll find it enticing to know that you can increase and control your partner’s orgasm as well through variations which we will go over later in this article.

You Can Get Away With Being Lazy

Still in the mood for some delicious sex after work but feeling tired? With missionary, you get to be a little lazy! You can be the bottom and allow him to do all the thrusting, and muscle work while you whisper sweet nothings on his lips and enjoy the ride from his hips!

The missionary position allows you to have your cake and eat it too! You can go a little at a time, take a break, and then come back by being on top, or varying positions. Cake by the ocean, anyone?

Lots of Smooch Action!

Kissing is one of the most sexual acts you can do with your partner! If you do this just right you can have explosive orgasms and intensify missionary.

Try licking the lower lip or gently nibbling, and you get to hear, feel, and experience sexy kisses that lead to mind-blowing orgasms with your partner.

How To Have Missionary Sex: The Basics

If you are anxious about trying missionary, have no fear!  This sexual position is simple and easy to follow!

  1. Lay on your back
  2. Allow your partner to crawl on top of you
  3. Bend your knees
  4. Rest them on each thigh or hip of your partner
  5. You can play around with your hips and legs and see what feels O-mazing!

Why Men Love Missionary

Believe it or not, men love missionary!  Here are 9 reasons!

1. It Doesn’t Involve A Lot Of Effort

The missionary position primarily involves a lot of lying down and just being in the moment. Therefore your guy will love missionary if he has had a bad day at work or if he’s just worked a hard shift and is feeling tired or lazy.

2. No Screwing Up!

Guys are just as conscious as women are when it comes to doing the deed. Missionary style allows guys little to no risk of screwing up and also avoids injury. It’s perfect for those less educated on sex moves as well.

3. He Can Hide His Face During Orgasm

Men can be a little insecure about us seeing their O face. This is perhaps because they don’t want us to see how crinkled their face gets or how it resembles a little kid trying a veggie for the first time.

4. He Can Go At His Own Rhythm

Men need to find their rhythm in order to enjoy sex. Hopefully, he finds what he enjoys and satisfies your needs before his own.

5. The View Is Grand!

Your guy loves to watch! Men are very visual creatures, in which missionary is a favorite choice of sex position because they can see everything. They can watch your lovely bosoms dance with your joy or your ass jump in pleasure with every thrust!

6. You Can Have Sex Either In the Morning or in the Heat Of the Night

All men agree that this is the caffeine of sex! Having trouble waking up? Make love to your man, it really sets the mood for the day or at night, it helps you sleep better too! Hello, sexy endorphins!

7. Avoid Being Scolded For a Messy Room

It’s the ideal distraction when you are laying down facing the ceiling because you won’t notice the dirty mess he promised you he’d pick up.

8. Welcome To The Gun Show, Free of Charge!

Men love to physically show off. In the missionary position, they can flex their forearms, engage their biceps, or clench their sexy six-pack abs. Men get to give you a very personalized tour of their bodies and all the muscles they work out so hard at the gym!

9. Clean Up Is a Breeze!

Men hate getting fluid on them, especially if it’s their own sperm. This position allows them to cum and not have to worry about too much cleanup. It also makes it easier to fit into their busy work schedule because it can be quick.

What Your Partner Does In Missionary Position

If your partner is the top or ring leader during missionary, their job is to make sure that you are enjoying yourself! Most importantly they are to ensure 100% success in making your body turn into complete mush from explosive orgasms.

What You Do In Missionary Position

As the bottom, your goal is to have the best sex of your life!

While it may seem that laying there doesn’t give you much control, you will be happy to know you do have control over two important things: 1. How deep he goes inside you and 2. How much stimulation you get to your clit.

To Have Clit Stimulation

Your clit is one of the most sensitive areas and one of the best ways to achieve orgasm. So make sure you give your queen of orgasms some attention! With each thrust that your partner gives, grind your clit against their pubic bone. It will take some time to find your sexy beat once you do, the missionary position will never be the same again!

How to Stimulate Your Lady’s Clit Using Your Hands

Are you worried about not revving her engine as well as you have fantasized about? Fear not! These moves will make you feel like the king of clits and have your woman begging for more!

Rub Her Into Bliss

Using your fingers or hand, brush up and down or back and forth across her clitoris or clitoral hood.

Knock Knock

Apply a gentle tapping motion to her clit this will help her become closer to orgasm.

Peace Out Girl Scout!

Form your index and middle finger into a peace sign. Be very careful not to apply too much pressure as you gently press her clit and clitorial hood. You can tug up and down or forward and backward.

Around the World

Softly brush your finger in a circular motion around the clit.  It will drive her wild!

Good Vibrations

Ladies love a good buzz! You can use a vibrator to practice any of the above techniques we mentioned above! It is important to keep in mind if she has not experienced a lot of sex toys that you may want to take it slow and start on the lowest setting and then if she is okay with it, gradually increase the speed.

How to Stimulate Your Woman’s Clit Oral Edition

Ladies love a good eating-out session! If you haven’t a clue on how to please her using your tongue or want to better your tongue game, keep reading!

Consistency Is Key

First off, DO NOT dive in there with your tongue like you’re a deep sea explorer. You will turn her off and most likely she will either kick or punch you in the head. A woman’s clit is extremely sensitive and needs to be cared for with the utmost respect!

Start off by gently licking up and down, side to side, or in clockwise motions. Note which ones make her thrash like a fish in pleasure and which ones make her lay there, like a displeased starfish.

Ask Her What She Likes

Many guys underestimate the power of communication especially during oral sex. Ask her what she enjoys down there or even show you how she touches herself. Apply what she shows you and mimic her fingers but with your tongue!

Explore the Clitoral Hood

The clitoral hood acts just as a man’s foreskin acts for his penis. Many women say that direct clitoral action is not enough to get them off.

Many also express that direct stimulation to the clitoris is too much intensity and many also say that it hurts more than feels good. So the next time you want to eat your woman out like The Last Supper, don’t pull the clitoral hood back.

Leave it over the clitoris.

You will find that as you are licking the clitoris with the clitoral hood over it, your woman will feel great and will not be discomforted or pained.

G-Spot Experimentation

Does your lady enjoy a little internal tongue action? Try inserting your tongue into the vaginal canal and lick up towards her belly button, behind her pubic bone area. Note that with this area she may not enjoy G Spot tickling from your tongue so pay attention to every motion her body makes while you’re licking her insides.

Be Patient With Her

There is nothing worse for women who may take a little longer to cum, than when their partner stops JUST as they’re about to cum. If it irritates you when your girl becomes impatient while giving you a nice blow job, think of how she feels when you do it to her.

Be patient and let her enjoy all of the sexy sensations you’re giving her. We do love a patient gentleman in the bedroom, boys!

For Deeper Penetration

To allow deeper penetration simply raise your legs up. If you are getting tired of holding them there you can also place them around their sexy back.

How To Keep Missionary Sex Interesting

Once you get the hang of missionary, you may find that your inner sex goddess is calling out for relief of boredom. Don’t worry, here is a list of ways to keep missionary enticing:

Orgasm Before Intercourse

Most women do not orgasm from intercourse. Have your partner perform loving oral in order to get your engine lubed up.

Having an orgasm before the big show will provide more relaxation for you and orgasm will be more probable during intercourse. This also increases your partner’s confidence and you will both be enjoying each other more and worrying less about how long you are going to last.

Get More Handsy

Touch is an essential part of missionary. Run your hands up and down their body, and let them talk to your body with their fingertips. Rub yourselves against each other. These are all incredibly sexy ways to amplify touch during missionary.

It’s All In The Hips!

Your partner doesn’t have to have all the fun on top! Try folding your knees and moving your hips. You can try large or small circles, waves, and even heart patterns that you draw with your hips! As you explore how moving your hips intensifies missionary, keep going until he finds and strums your G-Spot with his penis!

More Clit Pleasure Please!

Don’t neglect your clit during intercourse! While your partner is inside you reach your hand down and stroke your clit. It will make your sexual energy more powerful! You can also try mini vibrators or even ring vibrators to also stimulate your clitoris.

Staring Contest

While your partner is thrusting inside you keep your gazes on each other until you both orgasm. This will intensify the emotional connection between the two of you.

Be warned you will feel a ton of emotions at once with this! You may even shed a tear or two!

Let The Bad Girl Out to Play

If you want to heat up the missionary life in your bedroom, you can try some light bondage. Have your partner tie you spread eagle to the bed posts and blindfold you, all while you sit there and enjoy. The blindfold with make you extra sensitive and the restraints will also make your senses heightened.

Just be sure to have a safe word and talk things through before you play.

Get a Little Fiesty

While your man is inside you, run your nails up and down their back lightly and ask them to tell you if they want you to add more pressure or stay at that pace you’re at. You can also role-play as a sexy vamp and give him sexy love bites on his neck.

Whisper Dirty Little Secrets In His Ear

You can experiment by whispering sweet little things like “I love you” into your partner’s ear. But if your sexy devil wants to come out and play you can whisper something like “Is that all you got?  Come on out some muscles into it.”

Play around with words and different ways to talk dirty and see which ones really send your partner over the edge. Beware! Sex may last longer than you wish!

Just Breathe!

Scientific studies show that changing your breathing technique can add some extra excitement to sex.

Take slow, deep breaths. As you do this make a note in your mind of the sensations going through your body. You can also make breathing a game by having your partner follow your breathing patterns, and rhythms as he penetrates you.

This also helps your guy know what you like by causing him to have no choice but to notice your body changing patterns with your breathing. You also get control of him inside of you because he has no choice but to follow your breathing in order to achieve pleasing you.

Missionary Variations

We get it! The missionary position can become boring and routine. These missionary positions will add some serious excitement to your missionary routines!

Propped For Pleasure

If your partner is feeling embarrassed because he is not as endowed as he wishes, this position will make him feel like his penis is the king of penisland!

Bonus points for also providing deep penetration to you!

  1. Bend your knees and lift so your legs are bent and up, parallel to the floor.
  2. Place a pillow, or roll a towel, place it so that it is underneath your butt.  This will bring your hips up and this little move will bring an explosion of sensation.

The Dirty Breakfast

This move is sure to add a little extra energy to your morning sex routine!

This move is also great because if you are tight, or don’t like deep penetration this can alleviate some of the depth of his penis inside you.

  1. Lay on your back on a hard surface such as a counter or table
  2. Rest your legs with knees bent, on your partner’s hips/buttocks.
  3. During intercourse tell your partner you will make their favorite breakfast meal is they get you off within the next 10 minutes.
  4. When finished make sure you cook your partner’s breakfast as promised and also make sure you clean the table.

You Make My Kitty Say Hello

This position is sure to make your kitty purr in delight. This position focuses on rubbing all the right spots in the right way to get you purring in delight! If you really want to bring out the inner feline within, you can even wear cat ears or a catsuit with an open slit in the crotch.

  1.  Begin laying on your back
  2. Rest your legs, bent up, at your partner’s hips.
  3. Allow your partner to raise his hips so that as he grins into you his pubic bone brushes against your clit.
  4. Have your partner move in circles with his hips, up and down, or go to each side.  Find what feels good for maximum orgasm.

Getting Frisky In The Moonlight

For this sex position, you will need to do it on a night when the moon is full. The geomantic vibrations of the night, plus the moonlight will heighten your sexual experience. This position also allows exploration of your vagina and finding what feels just exquisite for mind-blowing orgasms.

  1. Begin on your back
  2. Bring your legs straightened, to your chest.
  3. If this is too uncomfortable to be in this position you add a towel or slightly bend your knees.
  4. Make it into a game whoever moans and loses control first has to buy the other dinner!

Locked and Loaded

For those of you who may have boyfriends or husbands with a smaller penis, this position not only heightens the experience for you as the bottom but as the top it helps your partner’s confidence in knowing that he will be able to fit inside you and not fear slipping.

  1. Lay on your back
  2. While your partner is on top of you straighten your legs.
  3. Keeps your legs together and flat
  4. Enjoy the new and improved missionary experience!

Give Me More

Studies show that women are as much as 50% more likely to achieve orgasm from seeing their partner going yearning for them during sexual intercourse.

  1. Lay on your back
  2. Lift your legs up, keep them straight
  3. Gradually lower them onto your partner’s shoulders.  Take this slow it may be uncomfortable the first time you do it.
  4. While in Give Me More, you can also kiss your partner, make extreme eye contact, and watch as their sexy muscular body contracts and contorts with every pump.

The Vertical Hop

Is your man hung like a horse? Don’t fret!

Try this sex move in order to accommodate his large endowments!

  1. Lay down
  2. While in the regular missionary position, which is where you are simply lying under him without your legs raised or anything fancy, have your partner make a 45-degree turn, to one side.  Your bodies will create an ‘X’.
  3. You get a sexy view of his gorgeous back muscles and his fabulous derriere!  Score!

Five Advanced Missionary Moves

If you are ready to take your missionary game to the next level these 5 moves should definitely be on your bucket list of sex positions!

Sex doesn’t always have to be routine. You just need an open mind, an open partner, and a willingness to try!

The Sexy ‘X’

You will love this move if you are looking for a quickie, want to hit your G-spot, or want to spice it up in your home office. You don’t need a bed for this position (score!)

  1. Lay on the end of a desk, or a hard surface such as a coffee table, with your legs off the edge.
  2. Your guy will then be between your legs.
  3. He will gently lift your straight legs up into the air and then cross your ankles.
  4. He will hold onto your crossed ankles for the entire time.

Fly Free

This move requires both partners to make an effort for the move to be fully effective so no one can complain about the other didn’t do as much work. It also allows deep penetration for both of you.

  1. Find a flat, sturdy surface a little lower than his cock.
  2. Have your man kneel down and begin to enter you.
  3. As he is doing this slowly raise your legs up one at a time.
  4. Rest each leg upon his shoulders and while you are in this position move your hips up into the air, a couple of inches.
  5. For extra support have your cup your ass, or hold onto your hips, the last thing you want is a bruised tailbone.

The Split

That Pilates class not only helped tone your tummy and legs but it also helps with this sexy move!  Hello personal trainer! 😉

You both will love this move because it allows for deep intercourse.

  1. Lie on your back.
  2. As your partner straddles you, raise one leg up and keep the other straight.
  3. You can get in some extra toning exercises by switching legs.

Bridge Pose

Who knew this yoga and pilates pose that gives us women that sculpted derriere and strong hips we desire is also a great sexy pose! You can even play this up by one of you being a yoga instructor and teaching your sexy student how to do this pose. Add in getting dirty on a yoga mat and you can namaste in pleasure all day!

Crab Lovin’

Who knew the crab walk we all learned in our gym classes as kids would spice up as sex lives as adults? You can even add some extra flare by booking a private beach in the tropics somewhere or making love at night in the moonlight on the beach.

Who knew crabs could be so romantic and steamy? Perhaps your man has been acting a little naughty and you’re feeling a little extra crabby, you get all the control in this move as you grind up against him.

  1. Both you and your partner begin sitting on the floor.
  2. Life yourself up with your legs bent so that your hands are holding up your weight from behind you.
  3. Walk towards each other in this position until you can sit down on his cock.
  4. If you seek deeper penetration you can change this move by bending your elbows.


Missionary sex does not mean you have a boring sex life. In fact, it’s the foundation of building a wonderful and long-lasting relationship in and out of the bedroom.

Hopefully, this guide will give you a good starting foundation for creating long, lustful, and orgasmic adventures in the bedroom. If you are new to sex, or missionary style sex, or looking to add additional spice to missionary, this guide does just that.

Video Lessons of Our Best-Kept Secrets

Learning about sex positions from reading articles is a good start, but it’s not the best way to learn. To really take your Sex Life to the next level you need detailed demonstrations of all the best techniques.

Our 10-year resident “sexpert” has created an amazing new program called Triggers 2.0 where we reveal our best-kept secrets for female orgasms and sexual pleasure. If you want to give your partner the best orgasm she’s ever had, you need to get access to this program.

These step-by-step video demonstrations reveal our best-kept secrets. If you want to make your partner squirt, give her full-body orgasms, multiple orgasms, and more then this program will teach you exactly how to do that. Don’t try to guess, don’t try to figure it out alone with trial and error. Learn directly from one of the best experts in the world. That’s why we created this program. See you inside.

Laura Rose Halliday

Laura Rose Halliday started The School Of Squirt back in 2012 and has been running the website and digital courses along with Jakob Wulfe since then. She is a full time sex writer, researcher and practicer.

Disclosure: Our content is reader-supported. This means if you click on some of our links, then we may earn a commission. We only recommend products that we believe will add value to our readers.

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  1. The most loving, affectionate and intimate position IMO. I do like the variations though. So many fun positions to try now.

  2. I disagree about. that a woman can not have an orgasm during intercourse. it is possible. but not without good penetration skills from the male. also. most woman has a numb vagina. you as a male. must wake the a-spot. deep-spot and g-spot of the woman. so that they become sensitive. and then in penetration, she can reach multiple vaginal orgasms. it can best be done with the help of 3-6 erotic hypnosis sessions. so that you condition the woman. and install some orgasm triggers. like orgasms on command. kissing orgasms. etc etc. so that you make her vagina super sensitive and orgasmic. It is not about anatomy. but all about the mind.

  3. Missionary is one of the best sex positions out there. What's often overlooked is its popularity when it comes to teaching a virgin bride in her wedding night. Most of us, including almost all of my friends, had it done in missionary.

    We probably all remember the mixed feelings of excitement and apprehension, together with shame and insecurity. If we're honest about it, we have to admit that for most of us, it would have never happened if it wasn't for our husbands to take the lead and guide us. Being pinned down and taken care of by my husband was exactly what I needed and missionary is absolutely ideal for him to be in control and make it happen.

    Almost all of my friends shared the exact same experience of being pinned down in their wedding night, so I believe missionary is pretty much the most effective way for seducing a hesitant virgin bride.

    It's simply so easy to shift from an innocent massage and fooling around to actual sex, even if you're not expecting it! After the wedding ceremony, my husband just offered me massaging my feet, which I really enjoyed. I honestly had no clue that he already planned for full sex! At one point, he grabbed my ankles and lifted up my feet. He made me put my legs up over his shoulders and before I could understand what was going on, he leaned forward and I found myself pinned down with my feet pointing up towards the headboard. I was trapped entirely! I never knew or expected that this is the most common way to teach a virgin girl. Only afterwards I learned that basically all my friends had it done like that. Looking back at it, it even makes sense. I would have been too scared to ever ask for it. But now that I was firmly pinned by my husband, there was no question about it and I knew that it was absolutely going to happen that night.

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