Foreplay...We've all heard the word, but how many of you are actually using it to your advantage?
You heard me right. To "your advantage" because foreplay, when done correctly, isn't just about her arousal. It's about yours, too.
There's a big misconception out there. Foreplay is never just a warm-up.
In this article, we'll cover:
Initiating Foreplay: Sex Tips & Strategies
Foreplay isn't just the moments before penetration. Ideally, you start with it long before you even think of the bedroom. Why?
And the longer you do it, the better the results. So, this is how you properly initiate foreplay with a partner.
"Most women need at least 20-30 minutes to get fully aroused and ready for intercourse. Foreplay is the key ingredient to a satisfying sexual encounter and can add to both partner's pleasure."
Isabel
SEXUALITY COACH
I. Start Outside the Bedroom
Everything you do can be part of foreplay. The way you dress, the way you look at your partner, and how you communicate can all build sexual tension.
Even acts of service, like helping out around the house or cooking a homemade meal for her, can be a form of foreplay.
Show her you care and make her feel special throughout the day.
II. Public Display of Affection
Don't be shy about showing affection in public. A gentle touch, a lingering kiss, holding hands, or a whispered compliment can make her feel sexy and appreciated.
These small gestures go a long way in helping you get her in a positive, light, and playful mood, which you can later use in the bedroom.
III. Set The Mood
We all know to set the mood before sex. How do you actually do that? Setting the mood is really just a few simple key steps.
Each one of these actions ensures she can feel the room shift towards something a bit more intimate.
This step is super important if the mood is anything other than sexual beforehand. The transition from non-sexual to sexual is not dramatic or fast, usually. It typically is a slow shift that builds over time.
Now that you've got these 3 steps locked down, you're ready to move on to the next phase.
Foreplay Techniques
Unlike other sexual activities, you don't need to do anything wild or crazy for great foreplay. Simple works time and time again.
In reality, the only way to go wrong is to choose a technique you know she does not like, rush into things, or choose the wrong moment.
Foreplay techniques that actually work can be divided into 3 main categories, outlined below.
I. Touch Techniques
Touch is powerful. There is a reason why it is one of everyone's favorite techniques. Touch can mean many different things, but a few that you can try are;
When done on the right body part, well, the results speak for themselves.
II. Stimulation of Erogenous Zones
Speaking of body parts — erogenous zones. She has plenty of them; some, you probably did not know, were erogenous zones.
Tip: What are erogenous zones? They are parts of the body that respond more intensely to touch and increase arousal.
Common erogenous zones for her include:
Use a combination of touch techniques (listed above) to stimulate these areas.
III. Sexy Foreplay Games
Sometimes, just touching your partner isn't enough. There are times when you want to go all out, and that's where playful foreplay ideas come in handy.
I created these foreplay games myself, which means I've tried them out and know they work.
Not only that, but my clients' results also have shown that these games can really spice things up in the bedroom.
The goal of 'Death by 1,000 Kisses' is to kiss your partner's body from top to bottom while sharing words of affirmation, appreciation, and sweet nothings with every kiss.
Watch this YouTube video for inspiration, and cover each other in kisses.
One gets to be royalty for the day, with the other serving as the devoted subject. Fulfill each other's sexual desires because, well, your queen demands "tribute."
The next day, her king demands tribute.
Place an egg vibrator inside your partner before going on a date. Keep the remote; now, you are in control of her private parts and pleasure.
Randomly turn it on during your date and watch her face.
My favorite moments are, when she is walking, or when she is about to talk to the waiter— be creative and have fun.
Foreplay Ideas To Spice Up Your Sex Life
Ready to take your foreplay game to the next level? These ideas will help you explore new ways to connect with your partner and add excitement to your sex life.
Mental Foreplay
When a woman feels these three things, she can truly let go, relax, and ease into a sexual experience
- 1Safe
- 2Desired
- 3Seen
Making her feel that way is a mental game, not a physical one.
The brain is our most important sex organ.
It generates sexual impulses and communicates them to the body through hormones and neurotransmitters. All of our sexual responses and the pleasurable feelings associated with those activities originate here.
To truly unlock her body, you must first engage her mind.
By stimulating her mind, you can redirect her focus from everyday concerns to the sensations in her body, ultimately allowing her to fully experience pleasure and arousal
Isabel
SEXUALITY COACH
Once you have that locked in, you can stimulate her mind with one of these techniques, and her body will follow.
Sexting
Spice things up with dirty talk and vocal expressions.
Send each other steamy texts throughout the day to build anticipation for the night ahead.
Share Your Desires
Speak up about what you want and share your desires in the moment.
Use prompts like “I want you to…” and “It feels amazing when you…” to guide the conversation.
Engage In Power-Dynamics
Try out a Dom-Sub power play to create a bit of excitement.
Just make sure you establish clear boundaries and have safe words.
Emotional Foreplay
Creating a deeper emotional bond can make your physical connection even more intense.
Focus on activities that strengthen your emotional intimacy, such as the ones outlined below.
Questions to Deepen Emotional Intimacy
Ask each other questions that encourage vulnerability and honesty. This can help you understand each other better and feel closer.
Reliving Best Moments: Emotional Nostalgia
Reminisce about your best moments together. Sharing these memories can reignite the passion and remind you of your strong connection.
Give It a Personal Touch
Make her feel like the center of the universe. Tell her you care about her and show her that she’s your top priority.
Physical Foreplay
Physical touch is a powerful way to connect and build arousal.
Here are some ideas to get you started.
Kissing
Start with gentle kisses and gradually increase the intensity. Try different types of kisses and find out what she likes best.
Sensation Play
Incorporate spanking, or other types of sensation play to add variety and excitement.
Temperature Play
Use ice cubes, wax, or a glass dildo to explore temperature play. The contrast of hot and cold sensations can be incredibly arousing.
Introduce Toys
Bring sex toys into your routine. Some of the toys that I swear by are the Hitachi wand, G-Spot wand, and vibrator.
Pussy Massage
Give her a pussy massage to relax and give her an insanely pleasurable experience. Use gentle, slow movements to build arousal.
Eat Her Out
Oral sex can be incredibly pleasurable. Focus on her reactions to find out what she enjoys the most.
Rimming
Rimming can be an intensely intimate and pleasurable experience. If you haven't heard, a rim job is when one partner uses their mouth to stimulate their partner's anus.
Squirting
Help her squirt by focusing on her G-spot. This tutorial will teach you how to make a woman squirt.
5 Senses of Sin Foreplay
Ready to turn up the heat and play with all her senses? Let’s explore how to make foreplay a full-body experience that leaves her craving more.
Touch
Engage her sense of touch with sensual massages, wearing materials like latex, leather, or silk, and using nipple clamps just to name a few.
Touch her from head to toe, paying attention to every inch of her body.
Smell
Create an enticing atmosphere with a bath filled with essential oils, fresh flowers, or her favorite scent.
Use incense or focus on deep belly breaths together to enhance the mood.
Taste
Indulge her taste buds with strawberries, dark chocolate, and flavored lube.
Cook together or eat food off each other’s bodies to mix pleasure with play.
Hearing
Stimulate her sense of hearing by reading erotica to each other, playing a sex playlist, or sending sexy voice notes.
Sound can be a powerful aphrodisiac.
Sight
Captivate her vision with eye contact, eye-gazing, and playing with light settings or using a blindfold.
Walk around the house naked if you’re usually covered up, engage in mutual masturbation, shoot a sexy video together, or watch porn together.
Bonus Tip: Sensory Deprivation
More Exquisite Foreplay Ideas
Who says foreplay has to be predictable? Let’s dive into some unique and fun ways to spice things up and keep your partner on her toes.
Sexy Yoga
Get your zen on with some sexy yoga. Focus on poses that bring you close together and encourage touch.
It’s a perfect mix of relaxation and building anticipation.
Bondage
Add a dash of excitement with some light bondage.
Use silk scarves or a beginner’s bondage kit (handcuffs or velcro cuffs) to bring an edge to your time together.
Role Play
Ever wanted to be someone else for a night? Try out different scenarios and keep the role play going outside the bedroom.
Plan a “stranger” date night, where you meet up in a bar pretending not to know each other or go out for dinner without breaking character.
Perfect Day
Get creative with the SQL Journal Exercise. You and your partner write out your perfect sexual day, focusing on depth, details, and dirtiness.
I challenge you to then read it out to your partner.
It’s a great way to learn what makes each other tick, open the conversation for new sexual experiences, discuss boundaries, and maybe even plan a date that hits all the right notes.
A Man's Perspective.. What To Do If Your Partner Isn’t Interested in Foreplay?
These foreplay tips are based on what has worked for me in the past and for the clients I’ve worked with.
If your partner isn't interested in foreplay, here are some proven strategies to help.
Get to the Root
Figure out the stressors in your life that are messing with your desire for foreplay and try to eliminate them.
Stress and anxiety can kill the mood, so identifying and addressing these issues can help improve her interest in foreplay.
Voice What It Means To You
Your partner is not a mind reader, and neither are you. Voice your desire and explain why it is important to you.
Clear communication can make a big difference.
Be Curious
Explore what your partner likes. Ask questions like, "What are your turn-ons?"
Make a yes/no/maybe list of things you can explore together.
This can help you both discover new things to do in the bedroom.
A Woman's Perspective..
Sexy Foreplay Ideas for HER..
Isabel here. The tips I mention are designed for her to use on you in the bedroom, because what man doesn't like a woman to initiate sex with him?
Give Him a Striptease
Men love it when their partners dress up for them. More importantly, they love it when they dress down.
Ladies, play sexy music, touch yourself, dance, and undress slowly.
It doesn't take much effort to do, either. Just move slowly and give him a good view.
It works wonders on building sexual tension.
Keep Your Coat On
This bold move involves wearing nothing or your hottest lingerie under a coat with high heels the next time you go out for dinner.
When he asks you to remove the coat, give him a bold, flirty look. Chances are, dinner will be quick, and dessert will happen at home.
Kiss Him Like You Mean It
A kiss can drive a man crazy, especially when it's done slowly with good eye contact.
Wear Those Heels
Another easy-to-do technique that works is this — put on your heels.
Dress up in lingerie and heels, then walk around the house to tease him. The sight of you in sexy lingerie and heels will drive him wild.
It sounds too easy to be true. That's even more reason to give it a try. What do you have to lose?
Join Him Inside the Shower
When he's in the shower, jump in there and join him. He won't expect it.
Just look him in the eye, give a playful smile, and grab the soap.
Next, you'll want to be slow and playful as you rub him up and down, giving him a sensual massage and allowing the water to flow off his body.
Be intentional with your hands and fingers, ladies.
Organize a Date Night
You can do this anytime and anywhere. Whenever you're heading out for an evening on the town or just going for something quick and easy in a restaurant nearby, keep this tip in mind.
Dress up and enjoy a beautiful dinner together. Excuse yourself to go to the restroom, but instead, sneak out and go home.
Video call him while lying in sexy lingerie on the bed or send him a picture of you waiting for him. Watch how quickly he gets home, ready to get down and dirty.
There you have it. All of these tips are easy to do yet yield powerful results. The magic speaks for itself when, after using one of these techniques, he can't keep his hands off of you.
Frequently Asked Questions
Feeling the urge to try out these exciting foreplay ideas? Don't go just yet. I have a few more words of advice crafted to give you the sexual experience you crave.
Ready to take your skills to the next level? Join our exclusive online course “Foreplay Mastery: Pleasure without Penetration” and gain in-depth knowledge with expert guidance, easy-to-follow step-by-step explanations, live demonstrations, and a female perspective. Don’t just read about it – master it! Enroll today and start transforming your life. Get started Now!
