Why is it that the things we’re not ‘supposed’ to do feel so damn good? Wanna hear a truth bomb?—30% of women get more pleasure from anal than vaginal sex—and if your girl is one of them, you need to know why. Because if she’s craving it more than PIV (penis in vagina), you’ll want to figure out if this is a wild ride or a dead end for your sex life.
In this article, we'll cover:
A Woman's Perspective..
On Why Some Women Prefer Anal Over Vaginal Sex
Women’s reasons for loving anal sex vary a lot—from nerve stimulation to taboo excitement, even deep emotional or spiritual connections. Some women say they feel more in control during anal, while others describe it as the ultimate surrender.
Some even swear by a mystical, money-attracting energy flow (yes, really—more on that later). Bottom line? For some women, anal sex just feels better. Let’s break down why.
Reason #1 – She’s Afraid Of Getting Pregnant
While PIV-protected sex is an option—most men and women have had that "Wait… did anything leak?" moment after finishing. The thought of a bare penis inside can trigger anxiety, especially if she’s not on birth control. And even if she is, the idea of a potential pregnancy scare can kill the mood faster than bad dirty talk.
Reason #2 – It’s a Different Kind of Pleasure
Some women just love that tight, snug sensation. The pressure, the feeling of being completely filled, the slow stretch—it’s a unique kind of pleasure that vaginal penetration doesn’t always deliver. For those whose current sex life isn’t satisfying enough with PIV, anal gives them the intensity they crave.
Reason #3 – The Psychological Thrill: Control, Submission, & Forbidden Desire
Some women love the dominance-submission dynamic—whether it’s being in control of the act, or giving up control completely to their partner. Others love how forbidden it feels, like they’re breaking the “good girl” mold and embracing something a little more naughty.
And then there’s the “this is just for him” effect—some women feel like allowing anal is an exclusive act, something they reserve only for a boyfriend, husband, or someone special. In a long-term relationship, this can make anal feel like a secret, intimate experience between just the two of you.
Reason #4 – Deep Pressure, Nerve Pathways, & The Internal Orgasm Connection
If a woman is left desiring PIV intimacy but not reaching climax, anal can be the thing that finally gets her there. Some women even report that using non-latex condoms for anal sex enhances the sensation since they’re thinner and more sensitive, making the experience even more pleasurable.
Reason #5 – The Unique Rhythms Of Anal Sex
Some women love this deliberate, deep thrusting instead of the fast-paced jackhammering that can sometimes happen with vaginal sex (you know exactly what I mean, bro).
Reason #6 – Past Experiences, Trauma, & Emotional Associations With Vaginal Sex
Anal sex can feel like a fresh start that separate them from those experiences. It allows full penetration without the discomfort they might experience with vaginal sex. For these women, anal isn’t just a preference—it’s a way to reclaim their pleasure without the triggers or pain that vaginal penetration might bring.
Reason #7 – Some Women Link Anal to Intensity, Climax, Or Even Spiritual Aspects
It’s believed that anal play aligns your consciousness, spirit, and body with financial abundance. Andrew even dated a woman who was fully convinced that every orgasm through anal sex pulled wealth and success into her life.
Sounds crazy? Maybe. But for women who believe in energy shifts and tantric practices, anal is more than just a physical act—it’s a deeply spiritual experience.
And even for those who aren’t into the metaphysical side of things, some women just crave the intensity of anal sex, making it their go-to route to orgasm.
Women’s reasons for preferring anal vary, but the key takeaway is: it’s personal, not abnormal. And if you’re still scratching your head, wondering if you’re missing some secret memo—don’t worry, we’re about to break it down.
Do Other Men Have The Same Experience?
Have you ever felt like you’re the only guy whose girlfriend is all about the backdoor? Guess what? You’re not alone. And no, this isn’t just some weird, isolated case. Research and real-world conversations show that more women than you’d think have a strong preference for anal sex—whether it's for pleasure, psychology, or personal experience.
I. How Many Women Enjoy Anal Sex?
Spoiler alert: a lot more than most guys assume.
Anal sex has long been thought of as the “occasional, special treat” in heterosexual relationships, but the truth is, some women prefer it over vaginal sex entirely. And it’s not just anecdotal—it’s backed by research:
And for some? They just like it more—no deeper meaning, no hidden trauma—just personal preference.
Still think you're alone in the backdoor club? Trust me, plenty of guys have RSVP’d—let’s hear their stories.
II. Life Examples From Other Men
Let’s take a look at men who’ve been exactly where you are—these are real confessions from guys in forums who have found themselves in anal-only relationships—and their experiences shed some light on what this means for you.
My girlfriend loves anal sex much, much more than conventional sex.
One guy shared on SteadyHealth that his girlfriend is actively avoiding vaginal sex and only wants anal. Not sometimes. Not as a kinky "spice it up" thing. Always.
What Does This Tell Us?
New girlfriend obsessed with everything anal.
Imagine meeting a woman, getting hot and heavy, and suddenly realizing... she doesn’t even want PIV. No foreplay, no buildup—just straight to anal, every time. One guy in The Student Room forum found himself in this exact situation, confused about why vaginal penetration was completely off the table. Some guys in the thread were envious (“Lucky you, bro”), others were skeptical (“What’s the catch?”), and a few were just as baffled as he was.
What Does This Tell Us?
Ladies and guys... My girlfriend said she wants to have anal sex!
A guy posted on GirlsAskGuys about his girlfriend confessing that she only wants anal sex, and he wasn’t sure how to feel about it. Interestingly, men AND women chimed in with their takes—some women admitting they feel more comfortable with anal, some guys expressing jealousy, and a few warning that there might be underlying reasons behind her preference (like discomfort with vaginal penetration).
What Does This Tell Us?
How should I tell my boyfriend I want to be anal only?
Other women are nervous about telling their boyfriends that vaginal sex just isn’t their thing. In an Anal Only Lifestyle forum, a woman asked for advice on how to break the news to her boyfriend that she exclusively prefers anal and isn’t interested in vaginal at all. She was worried he might take it personally or think something was wrong with her.
What Does This Tell Us?
Girlfriend Wants Anal Only
A deep dive into relationships where anal is the main event. The Anal Only Lifestyle blog features real confessions from men navigating relationships with anal-only partners—some who love it, some who struggle with it, and others who are trying to find a middle ground.
What Does This Tell Us?
Clearly, this isn’t just your relationship—women all over are opting for the scenic route instead of the expressway.
So, you’ve realized your sex life is more ‘rear-wheel drive’ than ‘front-wheel traction’—now what? Let’s make sure you’re navigating this ride like a pro—literally and emotionally.
Andrew’s Expert Tips – How to Navigate An Anal-Only Relationship With Confidence & Connection
First off—breathe. You’re not broken, she’s not broken, and your sex life isn’t doomed.
Navigating an anal-only relationship requires understanding, communication, and a bit of strategic maneuvering. Whether you’re into it, on the fence, or feeling like you just stepped into a sexual Twilight Zone, there’s a way to make this work for both of you—without sacrificing your own natural desires or making her feel judged for hers.
Get Out of Your Own Head
With that in mind, let’s get into the tips.
Tip #1 – Ask Open-Ended Questions To Understand Her Preferences Without Judgment
You wouldn’t go on a road trip without a GPS, right? The same applies here—you need to know why she prefers anal before you can navigate it together. And that means asking the right questions.
How To Approach It Without Making It Awkward
Tip #2 – Express Your Own Desires Clearly To Find A Sexual Balance That Works
Look, it’s great that she knows what she likes—but you’re part of this relationship, too. If you love your penis inside vaginal penetration and you’re feeling left out, you have every right to bring it up without making her feel guilty.
Bring It Up Without Killing The Mood
Tip #3 – Use The Right Techniques To Make Anal Sex More Comfortable & Pleasurable
If anal is going to be your primary form of sex, then it needs to be the best damn anal sex of her life. That means zero pain, maximum pleasure, and techniques that make it feel just as natural and intimate as any other kind of sex.
Level Up Your Anal Game
Tip #4 – Introduce Variety With Toys, Lube, & Positions To Enhance Stimulation
You don’t have to do the same thing every time. Even if anal is the focus, you can bring in other elements to keep things exciting.
Ways To Spice It Up
Tip #5 – Establish Clear Boundaries & Check In Regularly To Ensure Mutual Enjoyment
Not every night has to be anal night. Set boundaries, check in with each other, and make sure you’re both enjoying the experience.
Make Sure It’s Always A Good Time
Tip #6 – Build Emotional Intimacy Through Aftercare & Physical Connection
Anal sex is intense. If it’s the primary way you’re connecting, aftercare is crucial.
Aftercare To Connect Deeply
Tip #7 – Decide If This Dynamic Aligns With Your Long-Term Sexual Compatibility
At the end of the day, you need to ask yourself: Does this work for me?
If you’re 100% happy with an anal-only sex life, great. But if you deeply crave vaginal intimacy, ignoring that could lead to resentment or frustration.
Things To Consider
No shame either way—your happiness and satisfaction matter just as much as hers. Own it, communicate, and enjoy the ride. Remember, a great sex life is about mutual satisfaction—so whatever road you two take (front or back), make sure you’re both loving the journey
Frequently Asked Questions
You’ve got questions, and—some of them are awkward. Whether you're a straight male wondering how to bring it up, prep for it, or decode her signals, we're tackling the most common curiosities about anal sex.
Some women come right out and say it, while others drop hints. If she's joking about it, guiding your hand toward her bum during foreplay, or casually bringing it up in conversation, she’s likely interested. If she’s watching anal sex videos and making sure you notice, that’s another dead giveaway. Some women are subtle because she's afraid you’ll judge her, so if you sense an opening, just ask her directly.
Keeping it clean isn’t complicated. A trip to the bathroom, a warm shower, and maybe a small enema help. Using plenty of lube ensures smooth penetration. If you’re worried about any mess, just pull out slowly and have a dark colored towel ready. She may feel scared of the idea at first, but reassuring her that a little prep takes care of everything will make her more comfortable.
You don’t—unless she tells you. Some men think there’s a "looseness factor," but the anus is a muscle, which means it contracts back to normal after sex. If she takes full penetration easily, knows exactly how much lube to use, and isn't afraid to go for it, she’s probably experienced. The best way to know? Just ask.
Foreplay matters—she needs to be turned on before you try. Start slowly, use a ton of lube, and let her control how much of your dick she can take. The key is rhythm over speed, because most men make the mistake of going too hard, too fast. If she’s scared, reassure her that she’s in control. And remember—never go straight from unprotected anal sex to PIV sex without cleaning up first, unless you want a bacterial infection situation.
Yes, and for some people, it’s even better than vaginal sex. The tightness creates extra stimulation, and the different angle of penetration can hit new pleasure zones. Some women actually find deep anal penetration more intense than PIV intimacy, while most men enjoy the tighter grip. If she’s really into it, she may even reach orgasm from anal alone, especially if there’s extra stimulation on her clitoris or mouth during.
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