How to Make a Girl Cum: Easy Techniques

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How to Make a Girl Cum: Easy Techniques

Marco is nibbling on Ivy's neck, she moans in bliss while she is cumming hard.

Making a woman cum feels like the biggest mystery in the world. 
Yet, I and the countless clients that I've taught over the years know otherwise.

Making a woman cum is easy when you use techniques that actually work (I'll teach them to you today), get ready and follow these for mind-blowing results that speak for themselves.

In this article, we'll cover:

  • How to make a woman orgasm during sex, using fingers, your mouth..
  • Must-Knows for men: How her cycle affects her ability to orgasm
  • Tips to increase your chances to make her cum

Understanding The Female Orgasm Spots

Before we get into the "how to", let's focus on the foundation first: Here are the key spots to touch and how to stimulate them to help her cum.

  • Vaginal Opening:

The vaginal opening is at the entrance of the vagina. It is hidden underneath her labia, the two lips on each side of her opening. To turn her on, gently massage and tease the area around her opening, play with her lips and softly tease the entrance without forcing your finger inside. 

  • Clitoris:

The clitoris pearl is found at the top of the vulva, just above the vaginal opening. There are also the wishbone-shaped wings of the clitoris that are located internally on each side of her vaginal opening. Use your fingers or tongue to touch the clitoris pearl with circular motions, gentle flicks, or steady pressure but be careful this little spot has thousands of nerve endings and is very sensitive.

  • G-Spot:

The G-Spot is inside her vagina, on the upper wall, about 2-3 inches inside. The texture is different from the surrounding tissues. During arousal, it can get engulfed and is a treasure of pleasure for most women. Stimulating it with your fingers and applying consistent pressure can help her reach orgasm or even a squirting orgasm.

  • Cervix:

Located at the end of the vaginal canal. It kinda hovers in the middle and feels a bit like the tip of the nose when you touch it. Some women enjoy deep penetration that stimulates the cervix others feel pain and discomfort when you thrust against it. Something I like to do is massaging her cervix, by inserting one or two fingers and gently touching it instead of poking it with the tip of your cock during penetration.

 
Fun Fact: The cervix moves throughout her cycle, sometimes it is further up and sometimes further down so you might not be able to reach it every time.

  • Anal Opening:

Yes, her backdoor, the anal opening is located just below the vaginal opening. There are tons of nerve endings coming together, which is why some people get aroused when stimulating this area. If you are exploring her ass for the first time, I suggest starting with gentle rimming (using your tongue) or massaging with well-lubricated fingers to help her orgasm.

  • Anal Canal:

Now that you are comfortable with her anal opening, the next logical step is to explore inside the anus. The anal canal is as the name says inside her rectum and no, you will not touch her poop. Of course, chances are that mishaps happen but especially when hygiene is a priority you both should be fine. Golden rule: If she's comfortable with anal sex or anal play, use well-lubricated fingers or toys.

Other hot spots are hidden all over her body.


Areas like her neck, ears, inner thighs, and breasts just to name a few.


Explore her entire body and find out which spots she loves the most. 


Use kisses, light touches, and gentle nibbles to build overall arousal.

Before I deep dive into how to make a woman cum, my wife and our female sexuality coach Isabel, will share her perspective. She also has the added benefit of having "the bits" herself so listen closely..

A Woman's Perspective...
On Making Her Cum

from Isabel
SEXUALITY COACH

I. Understanding Female Arousal

The image below compares the arousal patterns of men and women to highlight how they are different. Look at the four areas: excitement, plateau, orgasm, and resolution. 

Female Arousal

  • Excitement: The arousal level rises as she becomes more sexually stimulated.
  • Plateau: A period of sustained arousal where she maintains a high level of sexual excitement.
  • Orgasm: She may experience multiple peaks of orgasm, a wave of orgasmic energy, or one intense orgasm.
  • Resolution: Arousal level gradually decreases. If no orgasm occurs, the resolution phase starts without spikes.

Male Arousal

  • Excitement: Same as women. 
  • Plateau: Same as women.
  • Orgasm: A single, sharp peak representing ejaculation.
  • Refractory Period: There's a period where a man cannot be sexually aroused again. This period increases with age.
  • Resolution: The arousal level decreases rapidly after orgasm.

As you can see the arousal and orgasm in females are quite different from a male orgasm. Specifically after the plateau stage, the curve differs tremendously, especially if the man isn't trained in semen retention.

Without this knowledge, even the best technique will not help to make her cum.

II. Why The Time Of The Month Matters For Women

A woman will cum more easily, depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle.

Her cycle is typically 28 days, and during that time, her arousal increases and also can sharply decrease.

This image shows the changes in a woman's sex drive (red) throughout her menstrual cycle, showing the influence of estrogen (black) and progesterone levels (grey).

These are the key points shown here.

  • A woman's highest sexual drive typically occurs around ovulation (her fertile days), when estrogen is at its peak.
  • After her fertile days, there is a rise of progesterone. The increased level can have a moderating effect on her sex drive.

Understanding these hormonal influences can help in recognizing patterns in sexual desire.

Knowing those patterns can make it easier for you to plan when it's best to use the following techniques to help her orgasm.

Andrew's Ultimate Guide To Make Her Cum

Now we've got the theory out of the way, let's get into the good stuff.

After coaching thousands of men, I now understand great sex and orgasms always start with the build-up (i.e., foreplay).

Foreplay does the heavy lifting at the start so that you can sit back, relax, and reap the results at the end. 

Why it works

It builds sexual tension so that she is more likely to experience orgasm.

Moreover, it pulls her out of her mind and into the moment. Get her to be present in the here and now.

Jumping straight into vaginal penetration is not the way to start with foreplay. Instead, the number one foreplay technique for making a woman connect with her body and orgasm is a pussy massage.

I. Start with a Pussy Massage

A pussy massage (aka fingering her) is a master's technique for making a woman orgasm because it;

  • Stimulates her entire vulva
  • Starts slow, building tons of sexual tension
  • Gets her excited for more

Follow these steps to give her an unforgettable experience.

Step 1: Apply Lube

Step 1: Apply Lube

Take a good amount of water-based lube and apply it to your hand.

As soon as you have placed your hand on her body, you don't want to lose body contact until the pussy massage is finished.

Step 2: Hold

Step 2: Hold

Place your hand on her entire vulva.

Use your other hand to gently hold her chest or lower stomach for grounding.

Step 3: Copy Slide

Step 3: Copy Slide

Slide your hand downward slowly, letting your fingers and hand explore.

Move from top to bottom and then back up again.

Step 4: G-Day Mate

Step 4: G-Day Mate

Form a triangle with your hands and move your thumbs upward on each side of her vulva.

Step 5: Inner Circle

Step 5: Inner Circle

Use your pointer finger to explore her vaginal opening without entering yet.

Start slowly and adjust based on her response.

Step 6: Christopher Columbus

Step 6: Christopher Columbus

Insert your finger inside her vagina gently, exploring her walls slowly but fully.

Don't twist your finger quickly from side to side.

Step 7: Spiderman

Step 7: Spiderman

When she is ready, insert two fingers in a Spiderman web-shooter pose and explore her walls again, focusing more directly on her G-spot found on the upper wall.

The key to getting a pussy massage to work is never to rush, always pay attention to her responses, and adjust as needed.

II. Eat Her Pussy Like a Champion

Now that you've got her warmed up with a sensual pussy massage. Move on to oral sex.

Why it works

This works, because of all the nerve endings surrounding the clitoris. It's a slow, intentional stimulation of their clitoris.

Women especially love cunnilingus when their man loves giving oral!

A man who hates eating a woman out will make her feel awkward, embarrassed, insecure, or turned off.

As you go down on her, use different techniques with your tongue and mouth. 

  • Circles: Move your tongue in circular motions around her clitoris.
  • Up and Down: Lick up and down along her vulva without focusing on her clit at first. Explore the entire area and later focus on her clitoris.
  • Side to Side: Move your tongue side to side across her clitoris.
  • Sucking: Gently suck on her clitoris, varying the pressure.
  • Flicking: Flick your tongue rapidly against her clitoris.
  • One Finger: Put one finger inside while eating her out. 
  • Two Fingers: Put two fingers inside while licking her.

After you have warmed her up properly and maybe even given her an orgasm or two by using the techniques mentioned above, she is most likely ready for penetrative sex.

III. Time For The Main Event (Sex)

Penetrative sex alone is enough to make her cum if done correctly. The right positions and movements can make women orgasm, especially if paired with another technique, such as sex toys or oral sex.

Top 2 Positions

The top sex positions for orgasms are Cowgirl and Missionary. 

Yes — that Missionary. Trust me, when it's done as instructed below, it's one of the best sex positions for orgasms.

Elevated Missionary
Elevated Missionary

Normal Missionary is good, but elevated Missionary is even better. This changes the angle of penetration.

Place a pillow under her butt to elevate her hips. This angle helps you hit her G-spot and provides better clitoral stimulation during intercourse.

Keep the movements steady and rhythmic.

Cowgirl
Cowgirl

In this position, have her on top.

Tell her to grind back and forth instead of thrusting up and down.

This gives her better clitoral stimulation and control over the depth and angle of penetration, which is what's needed for most orgasms.

How To Move Inside Her

There are two main ways to move inside a woman.

  • Thrusting
  • Grinding

Thrusting focuses on friction while grinding creates a suction effect.

When trusting, use the tick-tick boom or 3-quarter pumps method.

Ask her to use her pelvic muscles to hold and squeeze you, or tense yours to give her additional sensations inside her vagina. If she’s close, keep your movements consistent.

Don’t forget to breathe, especially when she reaches climax through penetration.

Her vagina starts to contract, which will stimulate you even more.

Take deep breaths down into your pelvis to hold the tension and avoid ejaculating too soon.

Isabel

SEXUALITY COACH

IV. Add Some Fun: Sex Toys

Sometimes, you might want to spice things up to get her arousal to the next level. I personally love adding some sex toys to the mix at times.

If that's the case for you too, these are my top favorite sex toys on the market.

  • Hitachi Wand:
  • Hitachi Wand:

This powerful vibrator goes on her clitoris for strong stimulation. Start with a low setting and increase based on her reactions. Personally, I had huge success with this one, the wand is a universal winner for most women, especially if they like stronger vibrational stimulation. Be creative you can use the wand all over her and your body.

  • G-Spot Vibrator:
  • G-Spot Vibrator:

This toy is designed to hit the G-spot. Insert it into her vagina and angle it towards the upper wall, moving it in small circles or pressing hard against her spot. This is the #1 toy I recommend to my clients, when they look for toys to make her squirt. The different vibration settings can add to the experience and heighten the stimulation.

  • Clit Suction:
  • Clit Suction:

This suction toy comes in different shapes and forms, I love the design of a rose. It just adds a bit of romance to it. A clit suction device, as the name says goes over her clitoris. It creates a gentle sucking sensation that mimics oral sex. Especially women who prefer gentler clitoral stimulation love this toy.

  • WeVibe:
  • WeVibe:

This toy stimulates both her clitoris and vagina. You insert it into her vagina where it vibrates while it also aims towards her clitoris for additional sucking motion. My favorite part about it is, it also allows penetrative sex, which then vibrates both you and her.

Once you figure out what she likes most, maintain steady pressure and a consistent rhythm.

Avoid switching it up because women cannot orgasm if you change techniques every 3 seconds. 

The reason is very simple. Most women need a lot of time to cum.

So if you change it up frequently, she's not going to get enough of what she needs to actually let go and orgasm.

Advanced Methods To Make Her Cum

Less is not always more. 

To make a woman cum, you might have to try out a few more techniques in the bedroom and see how things go. 

These methods focus on unique sensations, dynamics, and practices to help her reach orgasm.

I. Erotic Massages

Start with a general massage to help her relax, then gradually move to more sensitive areas like her neck, inner thighs, and breasts.

Use a good massage oil to keep your hands gliding smoothly over her skin. Pay attention to her responses and spend more time on the areas that make her moan or sigh.

II. Stimulate Her Anus

Start by rimming, which involves using your tongue to circle and stimulate her anus.

Or just use a well-lubricated finger to massage the area during oral or vaginal sex. If she’s comfortable, try using anal toys.

III. Power Play Dynamics

Being assertive and manhandling her lets her focus on feeling rather than thinking.

Use a firm but gentle touch, give clear commands, and create a safe space where she fully lets go. This type of play lets her be within her body instead of her mind.

IV. Edging & Orgasm Denial

Edging brings her close to orgasm, and then backs off before she climaxes. This technique makes her final orgasm much more intense.

Use a combination of stimulation and teasing, paying attention to her body language and sounds. Repeat this cycle several times before finally letting her orgasm.

V. Rough Play

Rough play, such as hair-pulling, spanking, and light biting, can be a major turn-on for many women out there.

However, always communicate and set boundaries beforehand. Having a safe word might also be required, depending on what activities you decide on.

Start gently and gradually increase the intensity, watching for her reactions. This type of play makes her orgasms more powerful by adding an element of raw, physical excitement.

VI. Roleplay

Roleplaying is when you try different characters and scenarios. Choose roles that turn you both on, and set the scene with costumes or props.

By putting on a different persona, she feels freer and more adventurous. Sometimes that's what's missing and why she's not able to cum. 

VII. Impact Play

Hands, paddles, or whips can cause some pain, which can also be arousing by increasing blood flow and sensitivity to that area.

Always establish safe words and limits.

Start with light taps and increase intensity as she becomes more comfortable. The combination of pain and pleasure leads to intense orgasms.

Above, you'll find a few tools you could use for impact play. 

Final Tips from A Sex Coach To Make Her Cum

Emotional and psychological aspects are just as important as the physical ones when it comes to making a woman cum.

Creating a connection and making her feel comfortable can make a big difference. The physical part is easy; getting her mind and emotions in the right place is where the real work is.

I. Create A Safe Space

Make sure she feels safe and relaxed.

Set the mood with soft lighting, gentle music, and a comfortable environment.

When she feels secure, she can let go and enjoy the experience fully.

II. Unlock Her Mind

Help her be present and focus on the sensations. Encourage her to feel rather than think.

This means taking her out of her head and into her body.

Gentle touches, soft words, and patience can help her relax and be in the moment.

III. Get Your Mindset Right

Don’t go into the bedroom thinking you have to make her cum to prove yourself.

Women can sense insecurity and desperation, which can shut them down.

Be confident and focus on enjoying the experience without putting pressure on yourself or her.

IV. Enjoy Yourself

Focus on enjoying her body for your own pleasure, not just trying to please her.

When you genuinely enjoy yourself, it’s contagious.

She will feel your passion and be more likely to respond positively.

V. Use Your Voice

Talk to her. Reassure her and ask what she likes.

Dirty talk can also be a huge turn-on.

Use your voice to guide her and let her know how much you enjoy being with her. This helps her feel more connected and aroused.

VI. Final Revelation

I know you probably don't want to hear it...

The secret to making a woman cum is that you can't "make" her do anything. Nothing you do will work if she isn't willing to participate and relax.

What you can do is, create a safe and arousing atmosphere, listen to her physical and verbal cues, and help her relax.

When she feels comfortable and turned on, her arousal will rise, making it easier for her to cum.

The good thing about it is, you are not responsible for her orgasms. Good on you that you do want to facilitate a great experience for her, and don't get me wrong I am all for it.

However, don't think it is your fault if you can't make her cum, chances are you are not the only factor that adds to the equation.

Frequently Asked Questions

If you have a few remaining questions, you'll find the answers here.

How do I make a girl cum during sex?

Any of these tips should work;
  • Spend time on foreplay.
  • Ask her what she likes.
  • Pay attention to her body language.
  • Try different positions and techniques.
  • Make sure she's comfortable and relaxed. 

What is the quickest way to make a woman have an orgasm?

Touch her clitoris with your fingers, mouth, or a sex toy. Every woman is different, so pay attention to her reactions and adjust your technique. Often, clitoral stimulation is the fastest way for many women to orgasm.

How can you tell if a woman has had an orgasm?

Look for signs like muscle contractions, especially inside the vagina, increased breathing and heart rate, flushed skin, and a relaxed, satisfied look afterward. 

How much fluid comes out of a woman when she orgasms?

The amount of fluid released varies. Some women release a small amount, while others squirt a noticeable amount. Both are normal.

How do I make my girlfriend orgasm? She said she only came once with another guy and I am very jealous and insecure about it.

Talk to her about what she likes and what made her orgasm before. Spend time on foreplay and try different techniques.

Focus on making her feel good rather than comparing yourself to others or achieving an agenda or goals.

Ready to take your skills to the next level? Join our exclusive online course “Squirting Triggers” and gain in-depth knowledge with expert guidance, easy-to-follow step-by-step explanations, live demonstrations, and two female perspectives. Don’t just read about it – master it! Enroll today and start transforming your life. Get started Now!

Andrew Mioch

Andrew Mioch is one of the world’s leading sex coaches and best-selling author after spending 10 years learning from experts all over the world.

Currently pursuing his Master’s Degree in Sexology, Andrew has personally coached over 5,000 men. His expertise is regularly sought in publications such as Men's Health, Medium, and Cosmopolitan Magazine.

These days, Andy spends most of his time coaching clients privately and also through SQL’s online Mastery Academy.


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